Chapter 22

"Hyung"

To: Ha Na ❤️

10.20 PM: Are you done talking to your parents? How did it go?

10.46 PM: Should I actually expect my death sentence this time?

11.04 PM: Alright you're starting to scare me

11.21 PM: Are you okay? Should I come over?

11.55 PM: Please contact me as soon as you see this message

Jimin looked at his phone one more time before he decided to stop messaging her, he just had to be patient, no matter how worried he felt. He plopped down on the sofa in the dorm room, next to Jungkook and Taehyung who were both busy playing on the playstation.

"Care to join?" asked Jungkook without looking away from the screen.

"No thank you," replied Jimin and sighed deeply.

"Woah, what is with the sour face?" said Taehyung and paused the game, both him and Jungkook turning to face Jimin.

"Ha Na Noona was supposed to tell her parents today... about me and her, but now she isn't replying to my texts," said Jimin, "that is not a good sign, right?" Taehyung gulped and Jungkook just diverted his eyes, not knowing how to respond to that.

"Well you did say her parents were very over-protective, right?" asked Taehyung and Jimin nodded, "then it might have been quite a shock to them, so maybe they need some time to get used to the thought."

"I was already prepared for that, but I don't understand why she isn't replying? Could it be that they took away her phone?"

"Would they go that far?" asked Jungkook.

"I don't know, all I know is that I am unable to reach her."

"Does she still work at the library during summer vacation?" asked Taehyung.

"Yes, I think so."

"Why don't you go there tomorrow? Then you will find out why she isn't responding."

"You are right!" said Jimin, a small hope appearing in his heart, "I will go there tomorrow and figure all this out."

"Good!" said Taehyung, "now that that is settled, you can play with us." Jimin giggled a bit and accepted the controller, handed to him by Taehyung.

***

After several days with rain and dark clouds it felt nice to go outside and finally see the sun again, feeling the warmth that should be present in the summer months.

It was still morning when Jimin walked to the library, but he couldn't wait to see Ha Na, he had plans to practice with Hoseok in an hour but if he didn't get this case solved before that, he was sure he wouldn't be able to concentrate.

The library was quiet and only a few people walked around the shelves or sat at the desks, reading. Most students had summer vacation these days and tried their best to stay as far away from the library as possible so they, just for a little while, could forget all about school and lectures and exams.

But Jimin didn't see the library as a horrible place and he immediately felt new energy rush through his body when he walked inside.

At first he wanted to find Ha Na on his own, maybe surprise her, but when he had searched almost the entire floor without luck, he decided to go ask Ji Eun.

"Ha Na?" said Ji Eun with a confused look, "her mom called in this morning, saying she was sick."

"What? What is wrong with her? Is it something serious?"

"Her mom didn't say," said Ji Eun, "but one would think you should know, being that you are her boyfriend." For a second, Jimin was surprised that she knew, but then remembered that Ji Eun had been shipping them since way back, so he just shrugged it off.

"I haven't been able to reach her since yesterday," said Jimin.

"Is that so?" said Ji Eun, "maybe she is resting, don't worry she will contact you soon enough. It is probably just a cold or something."

"Thank you ms. Ji Eun, you are always so kind." Ji Eun smiled at Jimin and then waved goodbye as he left the library.

***

"So she is sick?" said Hoseok while he and Jimin were sitting on the floor in their practice room, still panting heavily after dancing.

"Yes," said Jimin and swallowed the rest of his water, "I am scared it is something serious since she is not reachable."

"Why don't you go there?" Jimin almost choked on his water and started coughing until he finally calmed down.

"Didn't I tell you about her parents? They just found out we are dating and now their daughter is sick. They will kill me."

"Be a man, seriously!" yelled Hoseok and hit Jimin on the back of his head, "your girlfriend is lying in bed, sick and worried because she can't text you. If you go there, at least she will know you care and maybe it will also be a way of showing her parents that you care." Jimin looked at Hoseok while rubbing his neck.

"Really?"

"Yes," said Hoseok with a sigh, "now let us go through the routine one more time until we completely collapse on the floor."

The hours passed by in the practice room and Jimin tried his best to keep up with Hoseok, but the many thoughts flying around in his head, made it almost impossible for him. After the forth try where he ended up on the floor, Hoseok eyed him and said:

"Just go already."

"But I haven't gotten this part right yet?" said Jimin and got up from the floor, looking like he was ready to go again.

"I know," said Hoseok, "and you won't be able to get that part right! At least not today before you have seen Ha Na."

"You might be right," said Jimin, "then I will leave you for now, we can practice again tomorrow, right?"

"That depends..."

"Depends on what?"

"If you have figured all this out or not."

"Yes Hyung, I will go figure it out and return tomorrow with a clear mind."

"That is the spirit!"

But that spirit almost left Jimin's body when he stood in front of the house he remembered so clearly in his mind. His heart was starting to beat faster and his hands felt sweaty and were shaking. Nevertheless, he walked up to the door with firm steps and then, after taking in a deep breath, knocked on the door.

All the while Jimin felt his heart stop in his chest, the door slowly creaked open and Eun Ji appeared behind it, with a shocked face to say the least. She didn't say anything, no "hello", no polite bow, not even a spiteful "what are you doing here?". She just looked at Jimin with ice cold eyes and she didn't move a single muscle, just waiting for Jimin to be the first one to say something.

"Good evening, Mrs. Cho Eun Ji," said Jimin and bowed, his legs wiggling in fear, "I heard that Ha Na Noona is sick, I wanted to make sure she is okay."

"We are taking good care of her, so don't worry your head about it," said Eun Ji with no emotion in her voice, and Jimin felt perplexed.

"I thought maybe I could cheer her up a little, since she must be bored lying in bed all day," Jimin tried his way forward, continuously looking at Eun Ji for some kind of reaction to figure out if he was on the right track, but she was impossible to read.

"She is too sick to see anyone right now," said Eun Ji without blinking.

"Of course," hurried Jimin and said, "I am stupid. I was just a little nervous since she didn't reply to any of my texts."

"That is because she is not allowed to use her phone-"

"Because she should rest, of course," said Jimin, but Eun Ji just continued.

"She is not allowed to use her phone because she has been lying to us. You see, we told her not to see this one particular boy, but she did it anyway and she kept seeing him, deceiving us, only now revealing what she has done." Jimin gulped when he looked into Eun Ji's eyes as she spoke about that boy that he knew was him.

"I am really sorry, Mrs. Cho," said Jimin and bowed again, this time for much longer, before he straightened his back and continued, "it was never my intention to break the trust between Ha Na Noona and her parents. I should have insisted that you knew she was hanging out with me, I was acting immature, probably because I already started having feeling for her at that time." There was a minute of silence where only the chippering birds and the bypassing cars could be heard, but then an overshadowing sigh left Eun Ji's lips.

"Are you done talking? Because I have to go take care of my sick daughter."

"Yes, I am so sorry for taking up your time, but if you could please tell her I stopped by-" the door was shut in his face before he was able to finish the sentence and he lowered his head and then turned around, ready for the long walk home.

When he walked away from the door, down the path to the garden gate, he suddenly noticed a tall figure standing behind the bushed, and when Jimin lifted his eyes, he was shocked to see Hakyeon leaning against a streetlight with his arm crossed and a lifted brow.

"That didn't go too well, did it?" said Hakyeon and Jimin just rolled his eyes and started walking again.

"I am not in the mood for your jokes right now," said Jimin.

"Hey," shouted Hakyeon and Jimin turned around. Hakyeon was fidgeting with his hands and kept looking around the neighborhood before he again locked eyes with Jimin.

"Do you want to come inside?"

This certainly wasn't the way Jimin had imagined things would turn out when he left the practice room a few hours earlier, but here he was, sitting on the floor of Hakyeon's bedroom with Hakyeon staring coldly at him, not that this part was any different from the usual treatment he got from him.

"There you go," said a tall lady when she handed Jimin a warm cup of tea and then showed a cute smile.

"Thank you, Mrs..." Jimin was struggling to remember the name of Hakyeon's mom even though it had only been a few minutes since she told him.

"Kim Bo Ra," said the lady and smiled again, "please call me if you need anything." Bo Ra then left the two men alone in Hakyeon's room.

While holding the cup in his hands, feeling the warmth spreading slowly, he looked around in the bedroom that was incredibly clean with everything neatly organized and in place. The bed in the corner was covered in its blankets, not a single fold shown. The floor was covered in a soft carpet, making it comfortable to sit on and the wall across from the bed was filled with closets and shelves with many trophies displayed on them

"Did you win all those?" asked Jimin before he blew on his tea.

"I did," said Hakyeon, seeming a bit happy that he noticed, "but I have been a professional dancer for about 10 years."

"That long?" asked Jimin.

"Yeah time flies by quickly," said Hakyeon and leaned back on the floor, his hands supporting him from falling, "soon you will have been in it for just as long."

"I am not sure," said Jimin and took a sip from the tea but quickly drew back, realizing that it was still too hot.

"Aren't you going to audition at that company? Then you will be a professional too."

"But I am already 22 years old, sometimes I think it is too late for me."

"Nonsense," said Hakyeon, "if you have the motivation and the willpower to work hard then you will be able to achive just as much as people who came into the business at 15 years old." Jimin started laughing silently and Hakyeon furrowed his brows.

"I am sorry," said Jimin and stopped laughing, "but when you are being so nice to me, it scares me."

"So you are saying I should treat you like crap?" said Hakyeon in all seriousness and Jimin wished he could take back his words.

"No of course not! I am happy to get along with you, I know how much you mean to Ha Na Noona." Hakyeon diverted his eyes for a second, but then looked back, not blinking nor showing any emotion on his face. 

"I am just not sure why you are being so nice, I am not even sure why you invited me in," said Jimin.

"I don't know either, I guess Ha Na means that much to me," said Hakyeon and leaned a bit forward so he was closer to Jimin, "I know you came to make sure Ha Na is okay, but Eun Ji didn't seem to give a lot of informations."

"Not really," said Jimin, "but I can't blame her for being angry."

"Eun Ji is very protective of Ha Na," said Hakyeon, stating the obvious, "Ha Na ran away last night after getting into a fight with her and she was gone for hours."

"In that heavy rain yesterday?" said Jimin, eyes full of worry.

"Yes, I went out to look for her with Namjoon and Byung Ho, Ha Na's dad. I found her passed out in a playground. We brought her to the hospital. She is alright now but she has gotten pneumonia, so she might have to stay in bed for a week or two, depending on how fast she recovers."

"I can't believe this..." said Jimin, reaching for his head.

"That is why Eun Ji was acting that way, she is still mad at you, but she can't bring herself to yell at you when she knows Ha Na is sick because they got into a fight because of your relationship."

"I have really messed up things between Ha Na Noona and her family," said Jimin, the guilt slowly growing inside him.

"It was bound to happen one day. That girl never fights with her parents. I haven't seen her get mad at her mom ever, not even once. Even if Namjoon tells me the fight yesterday actually happened, I can't picture it at all," said Hakyeon, "keeping all your emotions in like that, never expressing how you really feel, that is not good for you, especially not to your family and the people the closest to you."

"Sometimes I really notice the big age gap between you and me," said Jimin.

"How so?"

"You are just very mature, I am really grateful that you told me all this."

"Yes I am too nice, I know," said Hakyeon and got up, "but I have my limits too, so now you have to leave."

"Oh now?" said Jimin and got up as well, "sure, I have already taken advance of your kindness for too long." Hakyeon didn't say anything, but just started walking down the hall, towards the kitchen and the front door.

"Are you leaving already, Jimin?" said Bo Ra when she saw Jimin who was in the middle of tying his shoes.

"Yes, thank you so much for hospitality."

"You are welcome anytime," said she with a smile, "Hakyeon, dear, you make sure he get on his way safely."

"Of course I will, mom," said Hakyeon.

Jimin put on his leather jacket and walked out the door, Hakyeon following along to the gate where he stopped and Jimin turned around to say goodbye.

"Don't worry too much," said Hakyeon, "Eun Ji might not trust people easily when it comes to Ha Na, but if you don't give up I know she will come around. "

"Thank you so much... Hyung," Jimin looked at Hakyeon, trying to figure out if he should get ready to run for his life, but surprisingly, there was a fainted smile on Hakyeon's lips.

"You are welcome, now go before I turn into the old Hakyeon."

"I will, goodbye." Hakyeon stood at the gate, watching Jimin dissapearing down the residential neighborhood between the many houses and Hakyeon then turned around and went back inside.

"Did you see him off well?" asked Bo Ra and walked out to meet with Hakyeon, but her eyes soon got filled with horror, "why do you look so pale? Are you unwell?"

"I am just a little dizzy, I think I need something to drink."

"Yes of course," said Bo Ra and ran to the kitchen, quickly filling up a cup with cold water whereafter she gave it to Hakyeon, who had managed to drag his weak body to the kitchen. He swallowed everything in the cup in a few seconds and Bo Ra took the cup and filled it up again.

"Here, drink a lot," said she and gently nuzzled his hair.

"Thank you, mom," said Hakyeon and drank the water, "I think I will to go for a walk."

"Are you sure that is a good idea if you are feeling unwell?"

"I need some fresh air or my head will explode, I will not be gone for long."

"Alright," said Bo Ra after thinking for a bit, "if it is only a short walk."

"It is." Hakyeon got up and grabbed his jacket and walked outside, down the street, but in the opposite direction of Jimin, away from the crowded area and towards the lonely and empty parts of the neighborhood.

He looked up at the sky, cursed the sun for shining on him on such a horrible day, wishing for the rain to return, wishing for the dark clouds so he at least feel the sky was crying for him when he couldn't. The fresh air didn't do any good, his head still felt like it would explode any minute soon, his heart was going faster than a racing car but still, his legs wouldn't take more than one tiny step at the time, his feet feeling like brick stones, holding him back from simply running away, far away from everything.

He looked to the right and saw a lonely bench in the middle of nowhere, not belonging to anything, like a playground or a bus stop or just a green area. It was just there, all alone, no one sitting on it, no one noticing it.

He walked closer and looked at all its cracks and bruises. Clearly, this bench had lived a long life, probably seen many people walking by, wondering if they would come and sit down, take a break from the world, and maybe share their stories with it. He was sure not many people actually did it, but now, at least he would do it.

I must be the biggest hypocrite on the planet, thought Hakyeon to himself, telling him that keeping your emotions inside is bad for you, when that is exactly what I have been doing to myself.

Hakyeon leaned back, resting against the back of the bench, looking up at the sky only to feel pain in his eyes from staring at the sun. Maybe if he stayed here, he would vanish into nothingness, maybe he would just slowly melt away and become one with the bench, being the one to look at people passing by, hoping to hear their stories. Maybe one day he could even see Ha Na walking by, getting blessed by her happy smile that was even brighter than the summer sun. But when he imagined Ha Na and he imagined her smile, he couldn't stop himself from imagining the reason for her smile as well, that reason who wasn't him anymore, but another man. And that man would hold her hand, hold it tight and lead her way, not only through the street but through life as well. Lead her away from the closed life she had before, the life holding her down, the life where he was the one to be a reason for her smile.

A tickling sensation on Hakyeon's cheeks occurred and when he came to his senses, he realized that the tears he had held in for so long finally made their way from behind his eyes and down his face. He lowered his head and started to hiccup a few more tears that seemed to push, begging to come out. So just for a while, just for a few minutes, he would allow himself to be weak, to sit on this lonely bench and cry, without having to be accountable to anyone, without anyone blaming him, or without him blaming himself, just letting all the tears fall and his heart sink until he had gathered up enough energy to put back on his smile and return home.

Hello everyone!

I hope you liked this chapter, which certainly took a dark turn at the end. I didn't plan for the chapter to go the way it did, but Hakyeon needed to let his emotions out, I could feel it when I wrote the chapter so I simply went with the flow and I loved the outcome of it.

This is still one of my favorite chapters. Writing about Hakyeon and his struggles somehow makes me really emotional and I hope it had the same effect on you.

Please leave a comment down below and let me know what you think. Remember to stay safe and keep warm.

Love, Annalise~